Ha

Oh, life. You're so funny.

So, I got laid off from my day job. I have many conflicting emotions about this.

I will not be homeless and will not starve. But my ability to save any money whatsoever has instantly disappeared in a blinding flash. In fact, depending on what happens next, I may find myself using money I so carefully saved.

Now, if I just had to have money, I'll bet I could get a full time job. It might not be simple, it might not pay really well, and it would almost certainly be something I disliked doing, but I feel sure that I could get a job. A job. Some job, of any kind.

But that was never the point. The only reason I've kept this current day job is because they allow me flexibility to pursue the things I really love. To take a job just to have a job and find myself without the time or flexibility to do any of the things I enjoy seems like...well, hell.

Truth be told, I haven't really enjoyed this job for years. It's a placeholder, it's comfortable because I know its irritations and limit my work time to contain them. However, there's no getting away from the fact that I enjoy knowing I'll get paid, and plan accordingly.

So in today's economy, how do I find work that will mean something to me? Well, the perfect answer would be book another equity show. But those efforts have not yet been successful.

I'm excited at the idea that I'd be free of this place. Just not excited to have so little money coming in.

I feel so many people are losing their jobs that I have to be grateful that a) I do have some savings, b) I do have some options, and c) I do have a tiny teaching job that will at least give me something to concentrate on while I make this transition.

Tricky - how do I shift my mindset away from squirrelling money in savings accounts and towards finding work I love, no matter what the pay cut?

What's in the Box?

I got fewer Christmas presents this year, and you know what, I'm thrilled. I mean, I like presents, naturally, but present giving at Christmas sets up this whole tit-for-tat that can lead to a lot of present giving just for form's sake. I can completely do without that kind of present giving and getting. It's worst at the office, where co-workers feel compelled to give you something, but either don't know anything about your likes and dislikes or just plain don't have the time or money to invest in a "great" gift for you - which is fair. I appreciate the difficulty, but my solution has been to give no presents at all. I participate in the Secret Santa, and call it a day. If I worked for an individual, I'd probably find him or her something, although honestly I've skipped that in the past as well.

Now, lest I come off like a Scrooge, I love to give presents to my near and dear. I love to come up with a really ideal present, something I know that person loves and will be excited to open. If I really can't find anything special, I go for practical, and make sure at least it could be used.

I normally get a slew of gifts, always from people who mean well, that I then have to find some way to re-gift into the world (because it really is a small apartment). Here are some items I would happily NEVER RECEIVE AGAIN:

• Stuffed animals. As a grown-up with little house space and no children, I have an exceptionally limited use for stuffed animals. Especially ones wearing Santa hats.
• Anything seasonally decorative. This decorative watering can filled with artificial poinsettias and a fake stuffed bird sitting on my desk - where do I put it? I have no storage in my apartment. Also, it isn't really my style. This goes for the decorative snowman I got last year from the same person.
• Candy canes. Nothing wrong with them, just, enh.
• Pierced earrings. I do not have pierced ears, which makes it awkward to wear them, and then I feel guilty. Boo.

I'm sure there are more, but my point is that this year, I got relatively few pointless gifts.

Interestingly, there are quite a few things that once were pointless that would finally come in handy: for instance, Christmas ornaments. My husband and I had our first tree at home this year, and happily he has a bunch of ornaments, but I was underrepresented on the tree. Don't tell me we could go out and buy ornaments. Sacrilege. In my house the tree is always decorated with all the ornaments you made as a kid or people gave you as presents, and they all have names and dates on them, and every ornament has a story. We always decorate the tree together as a family, and my mother tells all the stories, usually completely wrong. Nowadays the garbled stories are much funnier, because the dates on the ornaments often prove her completely incorrect. My personal favorite is the tiny wooden angel ornament she gave my Dad to tell him I would be born seven months later. Awww. But we have two ornaments that look very similar and she always tells the story while holding the one that is clearly dated three years after my birth.

Sadly, decorating the tree is one of my favorite family traditions that has been squashed by the move of Christmas to my brother's house, since he has two small children. But the small children are a good recompense, so I can take it.

Nevertheless, Christmas trees should be decorated with memories and personality. So where once I eschewed ornaments as gifts, now I'm loving them, building my own Christmas.

In the end, I think the perfect Christmas gift is a token of a memory or a reminder that someone cares enough about you to think of you specifically. Memories and Personality. It could be silly and inexpensive, it could be lavish and something you've always dreamed of, but it either gives you a story or a really warm feeling of love. Everything else is just trash weighing you down.

For me, I love the way the economy affected Christmas. Lots of that trash went away. Also, I love all the socks people gave me.

What about the rest of you? What was your favorite gift this year, and what did you get that you could have gone without?