Quick ones

This will be a lightening fast post, because my daughter is squirming away on a mat at my feet, and she will get bored at some point and require me to stop.

It's just, I cast my eye across one of my posts from November - oh-so-anxious-will-I-even-love-this-baby, and I feel compelled to go on record:

I totally love this baby.  I am absolutely in love with this baby.  And there are lots of anxieties, but they've changed into ones about her, not about me.  I still worry if we can make enough money to take care of her.  I still worry we can take care of her (there's a lot about babies I still find bewildering).  But she is beautiful and joyful in a way I really couldn't imagine.  When she sleeps, I look at pictures of her.  When she's awake, I like to nuzzle her baby-soft head.  When she cries, I hold her and try to make it better.  I love seeing her smile when I come pick her up.  Heck, I love seeing her smile anytime.  She is glorious. And she's not even fully a person yet.  I can't wait to see how much I love her when she's truly interactive, when she's fully exploring the world, when she can talk and laugh and crawl around.

I want to go on record to say: if you don't want kids, can't have kids, or for whatever reason won't end up with kids, that is not a problem.  There are a lot of things in life I won't do, and it doesn't take away from their value that I don't do them, and it doesn't take away from my value that I don't do them.  So please, when I wax poetic, I'm just telling you about what's going on with me.  It's incredible...for me.

And with that out of the way, let me get back to my bundle of utter adorableness.  She's so freakin' cute, y'all.  I luuuurve her.

Yep

Turns out, a baby takes considerable time and effort.  I expected that.  What they don't tell you is that it takes all the hands you have, and if the baby doesn't nap at convenient times, you don't have time to use both hands.

Also, when you pick midwives because they have a 15-20% cesarean rate, you just don't figure you will be the 15-20% getting one.

So, recovering from major surgery here, with a baby.  Who last night did not sleep.

Technically, this makes me a mommyblogger.  But truthfully, I am no blogger at all for the next few weeks.  Hopefully, I'll be back and can catch all 4 of you up on the highs and lows.  There are lows, ugh, so low, but happily, there are highs.  And I promise cute baby pictures at some point.