Ah, yes

I'm sitting in one of my favorite kitchens in the world, a sunny, bright yellow and green l-shaped room smack in the middle of Chiswick, London.  It's glorious, and wonderful, and odd.  It feels so much like home and yet I haven't lived here in 13 years, plus I haven't even visited for five.  I spent the day with my friend Maeve yesterday.  We haven't seen each other properly for eight years (on skype occasionally, but not in person), and yet it was almost as if no time had passed.

Yet I miss my husband, and I am here knowing I have been incredibly lucky the past few years, and that being happy here is partly the result of having made some happiness at home, in my actual life, with my lovely husband, who it must be admitted I miss dreadfully.  (He was spectacularly supportive about me coming to visit here, then when I booked the ticket he started moaning about how sad and lonely he'd be without me. Awww.)

Also, I think everyone knows now, more or less, but I don't think I've mentioned out loud here that I'm pregnant.  Which is exciting, but changes things.  It's also why I'm here - it was a pleasure to tell people in person, but more importantly, I can't imagine I'll have an easy time traveling for a few years after the baby comes.  In January.  Of 2014.

Yep.  Gonna have a baby.  A life-changing, possibly life-absorbing baby.  It seemed a good time to go haring off across the globe and check in with a self I left behind about twelve years ago.  And more importantly, with all the folks who are important to me on this side of the pond, not just myself.

It feels very natural to be here, not forced or strained.  There's just a hint of uncertainty before arriving somewhere or seeing someone for the first time, the pause of do-I-remember-how-this works? and then it eases, and all is well, and I am content.

I picked a time back home where there was no specific work scheduled, but of course, people keep needing things, which is annoying.  Or perhaps more annoying is that I can tell they need them, since my iPad works just fine and email comes through.  Oh, technology, keeping me tied to obligation.

More soon - mostly it's been old friends and very ordinary experiences that I am thrilled to go through - buying biscuits, riding the underground, looking out the windows of trains, getting a proper calendar in the stationery shop.  It's all regular and non-touristy and non-epic and I love it.  Hopefully there will be epic things to report soon.  I'll try to keep a log.